What rejection really means


Written by: Nikoya

My email and mailbox used to be houses for rejection letters.  I’ve attended plenty of job interviews, like most of us have, leaving thinking it went well- only to receive a rejection letter afterwards.  I’ve also stayed too long in a dead end relationship in the past.  Way too long.  Often times that creates a platform for rejection.  If it is not from the person you are with, it can manifest with friends and family who’d rather not be bothered with you as long as you are involved with that individual.

I’ve learned a lot about rejection.  Part of that is because I have experienced so much of that.  Not only as a “minority” (black female) but because of genuine disinterest of other parties I’m sure.

Rejection is great

Rejection means that the job, company, employer or the individual you are in a dead end relationship with, does not have the capacity for you.  They lack the ability to prosper you.  They can’t contain your power in a positive way and truly flow with your greatness.

As a result they reject you, even if they do not know the specific reason why they do so.

People fear what they do not understand. If I don't know how to fly a jet, I am going to be terrified sitting in the captain's seat in the cockpit.  This is because I do not have the knowledge and understanding on how to fly.  Flying is outside of my mental capacity because I do not have the skill or understanding on how to operate a jet, so I automatically reject the idea.

But when you experience rejection from something that you selected to be a part of, applied to or signed up for, it is out of your control.  When friends and family stop wanting to be around you because of the person you are with, it is because they recognize the fact that you are staying stagnated by that relationship.

When you receive rejection letters from corporations in response to "promising opportunities", it may have been the best thing to happen to you in the end.  You could have been signing up to be in the most comfortable situation in your career, however it may have been a situation that lacked challenge and the ability to truly prosper you.

It is the most comfortable situations that are the hardest to leave.  The cushiony corporate job.  The safe 5 year relationship. Sometimes the comfortable, but dead relationship can propose the most danger.  Staying too long could cause you to risk aborting your true destiny and purpose for the sake of something that is more of a hinderance.


When we are semi blind to our true destiny and purpose, rejection can be a helpful thing to happen to us.  It takes perspective to view rejection in a positive manner, but if you adopt that principle in areas where you have recently experienced rejection, it can truly aid in your personal development and mental maturity.

Without rejection and the ability to recognize when it is time to move on, we risk committing an abortive act towards our true destiny and purpose.

If I had stayed in my dead 5 year relationship for anymore time, I would have committed a spiritual abortion of my purpose.  There was no way possible that the individual I was in the relationship with had the capacity for me.  When people do not have the ability to prosper you and help you in a positive way towards your daily assignments and life purpose, it is a sign to move on fast.

Unfortunately, in my 5 year relationship situation, it took drastic measures for me to realize this.  I wasted 5 years learning a lesson I should have learned within the first 3 months of knowing the individual.

A spiritual abortion is the act of aborting your path to purpose.  It goes hand in hand with being a spiritual prostitute, which I wrote about in the linked post.  Both are bad situations to live in and negate our reason for existing in the first place.

There is no reason to go around, sad, when someone or an organization rejects you.  If they do not have the ability to recognize your potential for greatness, they aren't a perfect match.  Saving you both a lot of time and energy.

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